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The Importance of Self-Care: 9 ways to have a Mindful Morning

Self -care is essential during this time. I believe that in order to balance out your day, and your life, you must look after yourself first. It seems as if, you do not take the time to find your self-care needs as a first priority, It leads to stress, anxiety, and many other internal issues. These scenarios can set our day up for the stress. The good news is, is it doesn’t have to be that way. We have a lot of control over our own actions and attitude. Being mindful about how we start our day can help us feel more in control, decrease stress, help us engage in self-care, and be more productive. The best part is that it only takes 10 minutes a morning. There are many people in my life that tell me “I don’t have an extra 10 minutes; I don’t even have time to sit and eat!”

I respond by saying we have all day to accomplish our responsibilities you deserve at least 10 minutes to yourself, besides eating breakfast can be a mindful way to start your morning!

A mindful morning starts when you wake up and say a positive affirmation, check-in with your body to see how it feels, stretch right out of bed, or focus your attention on your routine activities. Etc.

If you are brushing your teeth, notice the taste, feeling, movement, which muscles are required, etc. If that is too easy use your other hand. Your body forces you to focus on that activity because it’s harder to accomplish.

This is a great way to get your day started rather than letting your day start you. Another habit I am also guilty of, and I know a lot of others who are, is looking at my phone before I get out of bed.

It is far too easy to think about all the work emails or the newest news, headline before allowing your body to actually wake up. Give that time back to yourself. If you have to be on your phone, listen to an inspirational talk or a song that helps you feel positive.

I can’t stress enough how important it is for you to invest in yourself. Take the time to start your day in a manner that will be helpful for you in the long run. It might be hard at first to incorporate a new habit into an already stressful morning, but you can help you cut down on the stress by engaging in some mindful self-care.

More Mindful Morning Activities

  1. A quick walk outside
  2. Enjoying a few sips of coffee without doing any other activity
  3. Positive affirmations- tell yourself you are going to do great today!
  4. Mindful eating- pay attention to what you are eating rather than rushing and just getting some food
  5. Looking out the window and noticing 5 things you see
  6. Meditation
  7. Not looking at your phone
  8. Smile- even a fake smile releases certain chemicals in the brain that helps us feel good
  9. Stand up/ sit up straight- when we are hunched over all the time our body tells us we need to be protected, but when we stand or sit in powerful positions it boosts self-esteem.

By: Heidi Byers

 

Financial Intimacy

 

Financial Intimacy  101

Money is not a four-letter word.  Then why do some couples fight about it or even refuse to discuss it all together?

You may have heard the statistic that money is the #1 cause of divorce, but that’s only partly true.  Whether you have it or not isn’t the root of the problem, it is typically what each person in the relationship thinks should be done with it that is the issue.

Some people grew up in a home where money was a taboo subject.  They experience anxiety or shame when they discuss finances.  Some grew up in a household where there simply wasn’t an abundance so they often heard the adults around them complaining about money.  Still, others experienced life with financially savvy adults who were not afraid to discuss money, no matter how much or how little there was, it was simply a fact of life.

No matter your background, you can change your outlook on money and finances at any time you choose.  Its never too late to begin discussions with your significant other about the finances you share.  Here are some quick tips to get the conversation started:

-Start the discussion at a mutually convenient, calm time of day.  Maybe skip that evening TV and sit down to look over the bank account together.

-Start small. Keep the conversations brief in the beginning.  Have a goal for the conversation, accomplish it and move on.  If talking about finances stresses one partner out, taking baby steps can keep them from getting turned off to the idea altogether.

-Keep the emotions at bay.  Money and finances can make people very emotional.  If you feel sadness, despair, anger or frustration start to emerge it’s time to take a break.  Admit that you need a break and will come back to the topic once you have had a chance to wrap your head around things.

-Decide on regular budget meetings (or whatever you choose to call them) that you and your partner can sit down together and see that you are on the same page with your money management.  This is especially important if you are working on specific financial goals like saving for a house, new car, vacation or paying off debt.

-If one person making all of the financial decisions works for your situation, then go for it.  If it doesn’t, don’t be afraid to speak up.  Even if one person is making all of the decisions on where the money should/could be spent, it is crucial both parties stay informed of the current financial status of the household.

I hope these quick tips help get the conversation started.   We are committed to your success as a couple, if you or your partner need mediation or counseling to help you through please don’t hesitate to call for an appointment.

 

Are you wanting a vacation in paradise, one that will re-kindle the passion that has been lost? A vacation without kids. A vacation where you learn how to communicate. A vacation where your partner actually hears you and gains insight – Vacation Counseling is Your Next Vacation.

Creative Intimacy

 

Creative intimacy is a relaxing, passive way to bring couples together. Sharing activities that bring us joy, stimulate the mind and spirit and help keep stress under control have immeasurable benefits for couples.  

 

Some immediate health benefits of being creative are:

  • Boosts mood
  • Boosts brain function
  • Increases immune health and defense

 

Creative intimacy doesn’t have to be complicated or expensive.  You can write a letter, play a board game or draw pictures with your eyes closed! Be silly and try new things often.  

 

Cultivating intimacy doesn’t happen overnight.  It is the daily effort we make to see more deeply into our significant other’s mind and soul. 

 

At Cape Coral and Fort Myers Therapists we see couples every day whose lives are forever changed by exploring conflict and intimacy and how to fight fair.  We want to help you too. We are currently accepting new clients at both locations for quality counseling services.

 

 

 

If you are not a resident of Florida, and find your relationship in turmoil we are excited to announce we are now accepting applications for Vacation Counseling for the 2020 season.  Are you in need of a vacation where the intimate connection can be found? Where your partner listens and gains valuable insight? A vacation with out kids? A vacation in paradise? Vacation Counseling is your next vacation.

Tuesday Tip: Aesthetic Intimacy

 

Join us as we start our fall series “Bringing Basics Back”.  This series will have a new Tuesday Tip every week with simple ways to open the door to intimacy  every day. 

Aesthetic Intimacy

 

For our first step in “Bringing Basics Back” we take a look at aesthetic intimacy.  Sharing experiences of beauty can relax and calm the body leading to opening up about deeper authentic feelings.   

Taking a stroll through the botanical gardens, enjoying the evening sunset together or perusing an art museum are all forms of sharing aesthetic intimacy.  

According to the University of Utah, there are seven health benefits to nurturing loving, intimate relationships: 

  1. We live longer.
  2. We heal quicker.
  3. We have lower blood pressure
  4. We are more physically fit. 
  5. We enjoy good heart health
  6. We feel less pain.  

 

When you take the dog for a walk tonight, invite your partner and enjoy the tall trees, gaze at the flowers in their last bloom of summer, or stop and watch the birds play and sing.  Your heart will thank you for years to come.

 

If you would like to discuss intimacy, or any other mental health topic with Dr. Brown or any member of her team, please visit Dr.April Brown