Why am I here? Ok, so not the deep philosophical question of “Why am I here?” but more the “What is my role here?”. Going a step further, let’s take a look at why I, April Daniel am here but also why you are here.
First, I can tell you why I am here with great certainty. I am here because I enjoy helping others. Because we have all been through difficult times on our journey and none of us are perfect. Because sometimes, we need that extra something to get us back on track or ready to continue to the next step, whatever that step is. I am here to listen, to help, to assist, to encourage, to comfort, and sometimes, even to challenge you. As a therapist, observing someone enter a therapy session full of confusion or despair and then leave having gained insight or having found some relief or hope is very rewarding.
This brings me to why you are here. If here is reading this blog or here is considering therapy for the first time or the first time in a long time, I can only imagine why you are here. There is a world full of reasons to seek therapy. A lifetime of reasons to seek therapy. And all are valid reasons. If you think you could benefit from a therapeutic experience, then you’re right! You can!
I have two favorite quotes. Ok, make it three. The first, is “Growth and comfort cannot coexist”. I will attribute this to an unnamed instructor at some point in my educational journey when I needed to hear it. This simply embodies the notion that if you are uncomfortable in yourself, your relationship, your life, your job, or in your own home then you are being challenged to an opportunity for growth! When we are comfortable, we can become very stagnant and complacent in our lives and most likely we are not growing. Whenever I am being challenged in some way, I try to wade through those negative thoughts that might tell me “I can’t” or “I shouldn’t” or “This is too hard” and focus on this opportunity to grow as a person, which is empowering.
This leads me to my second favorite quote which comes from Alice Walker. She said, “The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don’t have any”. Just take a second to think about that. Feeling empowered comes from within and it begins with how we think about ourselves. We think we’re powerless, so we are. Not to say we can control all situations. Instead, saying we can gain control of ourselves by tapping into inner strengths and available resources. As a counselor, I am also an advocate for my clients in all aspects of their lives. The goal is to lift the lid on those fears, negative thoughts, and anxious moods to learn more about ourselves and how we think. This is what allows us to move beyond that powerlessness and into a more empowered life.
My third and final favorite quote is, “Worry is like a rocking chair, it will give you something to do but you won’t get anywhere doing it”. Some variation of that quote has been attributed to several different people, but this version is my favorite. We have all spent too much time at some point worrying about or avoiding situations, other people, or eventualities. At this moment, we could all pinpoint some part of our lives where we are stuck and would like to actually get somewhere. Somewhere better.
So, there you have it. Answering the big questions. If you think therapy is something you could benefit from or are curious and would like to know more, make the phone call, send the email, submit the request. Even if it’s not with me, if you would rather see another therapist for any other reason – that is ok. As a matter of fact, scientific research has proven success in therapy is largely based on the relationship between the therapist and the client(s). If it doesn’t work the first time, try again. You’ll know when you feel safe enough, comfortable enough, “insert-your-needs-here” enough to continue with the therapist that fits with YOU. Who knows? You may gain additional insight into why you are here, or you may just learn more about where you want to be and start setting goals to get there.
written by April Daniel