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The Exhaustion of Never Being Enough

September 5, 2025 by
How Self-Improvement Culture Hurts Mental Health
 
Everywhere we look, there are messages telling us to be better. Read this book, try that routine! Meditate in the morning, journal before bed. At first, these things can be helpful. But after a while, it can start to feel like a job you can never finish.
 
Self-improvement is often sold as the answer to happiness; however, it can leave people feeling burned out and never good enough. Social media often makes this even worse. We see others showing off their perfect routines and achievements, which can make us feel like we are falling behind. Instead of feeling inspired, we may feel pressured and anxious.
 
Researchers have found that this pressure is connected to perfectionism and burnout. One study showed that people who constantly worry about making mistakes or not measuring up are more likely to feel exhausted and stuck in cycles of negative thinking (Limburg et. al., 2017). Another study found that burnout is often tied to low self-worth, especially when people feel they always need to prove themselves (Carmassi et al., 2025).
 
The problem is not the tools themselves. Meditation, therapy, and journaling can all be extremely powerful tools. The problem comes when growth becomes a race. When every part of life is about improving, rest starts to feel like something you have to earn, instead of something you deserve.
 
True growth often begins when we stop pushing so hard. It comes from kindness toward ourselves, not from endless “fixing”.Try this today: write down one way you are already enough, without changing anything. Keep it simple! Let it remind you that you do not have to earn your worth.
 
 
Sources:
 
Carmassi, C., Bertelloni, C. A., Dell’Oste, V., Pedrinelli, V., Cordone, A., Bargagna, P., … Dell’Osso, L. (2025). Burnout, resilience, and self-esteem in healthcare workers: A mediation analysis. Frontiers in Public Health, 13, 1537352. https://doi.org/10.3389/fpubh.2025.1537352
 
Limburg, K., Watson, H. J., Hagger, M. S., & Egan, S. J. (2017). The relationship between perfectionism and psychopathology: A meta-analysis. Journal of Clinical Psychology, 73(10), 1301–1326. https://doi.org/10.1002/jclp.22435
 
Filed Under: Anxiety, empower, Inspire, kindness, love, Mental Health, Narrative Therapy, Psychotherapy, Self-Worth

Prioritizing Mental Health When Going Back to School

August 22, 2025 by

Going back to school can be exciting but also bring a wave of stress, pressure, and anxiety. Whether you’re a student, parent, or educator, the transition from summer break to another school year is a major shift that can impact one’s mental health in several ways.

For students, returning to class can mean academic expectations, social challenges, and the pressure to perform. It’s important to acknowledge these feelings rather than dismiss them. Feeling overwhelmed doesn’t mean you’re not good enough; it means you’re human. Creating a routine that includes sleep, time for fun, and self-care can make a huge difference in maintaining one’s mental well-being throughout the year.

Parents, too, may feel the stress of new schedules, homework battles, or supporting children with their mental health struggles. It’s okay to seek support and remember that you don’t have to have all the answers. Simply being present and listening can help your child feel more secure.

As the school year begins, let’s normalize conversations about mental health. Encourage students to speak up if they’re struggling. Support each other with empathy and patience. And most importantly, know that it’s okay to ask for help, whether from a counselor, teacher, parent, or peer.

School is more than just grades; it’s about growth, and growth is never linear. By putting mental health at the forefront, we set ourselves up not just for academic success but for a healthier and more balanced life.

Written by Antonio Garland, Registered Marriage and Family Therapist Intern #4363

Filed Under: Anxiety, Children, Children counseling, Depression, empower, Family, family counseling, Inspire, Mental Health, Psychotherapy, teens

Reauthoring Your Life: The Transformative Power of Narrative Therapy

July 18, 2025 by

We are all storytellers. From the moment we begin to make sense of the world, we craft narratives about who we are, what we’re capable of, and what our experiences mean. Yet sometimes, the stories we tell ourselves become limiting—creating boundaries that confine rather than possibilities that liberate.

This is where narrative therapy shines. Developed by Michael White and David Epston in the 1980s, narrative therapy recognizes that we are not our problems, and our problems are not us. Instead, our challenges exist in the narratives we’ve constructed or inherited about ourselves.

Through narrative therapy, we learn to externalize problems—to see them not as inherent character flaws but as stories that can be rewritten. When we say, “Anxiety is affecting my life” rather than “I am an anxious person,” we create space between ourselves and the problem. In that space lies freedom.

The process of reauthoring our lives begins with simple awareness. What stories do you tell yourself about your capabilities, your worth, your future? Once identified, these narratives can be examined, questioned, and ultimately transformed.

Importantly, narrative therapy doesn’t dismiss our struggles but reframes them as opportunities for growth. Every challenge becomes a plot twist rather than an ending. Every setback becomes a chapter rather than the whole book.

By identifying “unique outcomes”—those moments when the problem doesn’t dominate—we discover evidence of alternative storylines already present in our lives. These exceptions form the foundation of new, more empowering narratives.

At Sage & Lore, we believe in the power of story to heal and transform. When you turn the page and write your own story, you quite literally change your life.

What page are you turning today?

Written by Petra Wilkes, Registered Mental Health and Marriage and Family Intern #IMH25031

Filed Under: Anxiety, Communication, Couples/Marriage, Depression, empower, Family, healing, honesty, Inspire, Intimacy, kindness, love, Mental Health, Narrative Therapy, Psychotherapy, Self-Worth, Women Empowerment

Healing Through Communication: A Call to Counselors Supporting Troubled Teens

July 11, 2025 by

Every day, troubled teens walk into our counseling spaces carrying the silent weight of trauma—abuse, neglect, broken trust, and emotional wounds invisible to the eye. As counselors, we hold a sacred opportunity: to speak life into places where pain has tried to silence hope.

Healing starts with communication. It’s not just what we say; it’s how we listen. Active listening, open-ended questions, and creating safe, judgment-free environments are not just techniques—they are lifelines. When we truly hear a young person’s story, without rushing to fix or diagnose, we honor their dignity and invite healing to begin.

In my journey through counseling, I’ve seen firsthand the power of integrating faith with practice. Scripture reminds us: “He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds” (Psalm 147:3, NIV). When we weave biblical principles of hope, redemption, and restoration into our sessions, we offer not just therapeutic tools—but a vision of a future rooted in grace.

Consider Joy, a teenager struggling under the weight of cultural identity pressures and family strain. Through intentional communication and a focus on trust-building, her family began to heal alongside her. Or David, who carried deep shame after trauma until sessions rooted in forgiveness and God’s promises helped him reclaim his sense of worth.

Evidence backs what many of us have witnessed: open communication and peer support significantly increase a teen’s feelings of safety, resilience, and engagement in their healing journey. As counselors, we are not merely therapists—we are builders of bridges back to hope. If you are standing in the gap for hurting youth today, be encouraged: your listening ear, your empathetic heart, your faith-infused words—they matter. Never underestimate the power of communication anchored in compassion and truth. A young life’s tomorrow may be forever changed because you chose to show up with both skill and soul.

Filed Under: Anxiety, Communication, Depression, EMDR Therapy, empower, faith, Family, healing, honesty, Mental Health, Psychotherapy, Self-Worth, teens

Yoga and Psychotherapy

June 27, 2025 by

In recent years, more people are turning to holistic approaches to improve their mental health. One powerful combination gaining attention is the integration of yoga and psychotherapy. While these two practices may seem unrelated at first glance, they actually complement each other in meaningful and transformative ways.

Traditional talk therapy helps people make sense of their thoughts, emotions, behaviors, and relationships. It offers a safe space to explore past experiences, process trauma, navigate anxiety or depression, and work toward greater self-understanding. But as anyone who has struggled with overwhelming emotions or persistent stress knows, our minds and bodies are deeply connected. What we think and feel doesn’t just stay in our heads, it shows up in our posture, our breath, our muscles, and our nervous system. This is where yoga comes in. Yoga, especially when practiced with awareness, is more than
just exercise. It teaches us to tune into the body, breathe with intention, and notice what’s happening in the present moment. When combined with psychotherapy, yoga can help people move through emotional blocks, ground themselves in the here and now, and develop a deeper sense of self-compassion. It can also be a powerful tool for regulating the nervous system, particularly for those recovering from trauma or living with chronic stress.

In therapy, we often talk about feelings, but many of us struggle to feel those emotions fully—especially if we’ve been taught to suppress or avoid them. Yoga provides a safe and structured way to begin reconnecting with the body, which is often where those emotions are stored. Simple breathing exercises or mindful movement can help bring awareness to areas of tension or numbness, gently inviting us to notice and release what we’ve been holding onto, often without even realizing it. For people living with anxiety, yoga’s emphasis on slow, steady breathing and present-moment awareness can be
grounding and soothing. It helps interrupt the cycle of racing thoughts and allows space for the body to relax, which in turn can support clearer thinking and emotional resilience. For those dealing with depression or grief, the gentle movement of yoga can help awaken the body and mind from a state of stagnation.

Ultimately, combining yoga and psychotherapy is about honoring the wisdom of both the mind and the body. It recognizes that healing isn’t just an intellectual process—it’s also physical, emotional, and even spiritual. Whether you’re working through trauma, managing stress, or simply trying to live more intentionally, this integrative approach can offer a powerful path toward balance and wholeness.

Written by Sophie Gengler, Master’s Level Graduate Student in Mental Health

Filed Under: Anxiety, Couples/Marriage, empower, Inspire, kindness, love, Mental Health, Psychotherapy, Self-Worth, Yoga