The Exhaustion of Never Being Enough
Prioritizing Mental Health When Going Back to School
Going back to school can be exciting but also bring a wave of stress, pressure, and anxiety. Whether you’re a student, parent, or educator, the transition from summer break to another school year is a major shift that can impact one’s mental health in several ways.
For students, returning to class can mean academic expectations, social challenges, and the pressure to perform. It’s important to acknowledge these feelings rather than dismiss them. Feeling overwhelmed doesn’t mean you’re not good enough; it means you’re human. Creating a routine that includes sleep, time for fun, and self-care can make a huge difference in maintaining one’s mental well-being throughout the year.
Parents, too, may feel the stress of new schedules, homework battles, or supporting children with their mental health struggles. It’s okay to seek support and remember that you don’t have to have all the answers. Simply being present and listening can help your child feel more secure.
As the school year begins, let’s normalize conversations about mental health. Encourage students to speak up if they’re struggling. Support each other with empathy and patience. And most importantly, know that it’s okay to ask for help, whether from a counselor, teacher, parent, or peer.
School is more than just grades; it’s about growth, and growth is never linear. By putting mental health at the forefront, we set ourselves up not just for academic success but for a healthier and more balanced life.
Written by Antonio Garland, Registered Marriage and Family Therapist Intern #4363
Getting the Relationship You Both Want (Not Just the One You’ve Settled Into)
Most couples don’t fall apart because they stopped loving each other.
They fall apart because they stopped feeling seen, heard, or safe.
They start walking on eggshells. One shuts down, the other over-functions. Intimacy fades. Conversations turn into silent battles or circular arguments that never resolve anything. Somewhere along the way, the relationship becomes more about surviving than thriving.
But love isn’t supposed to feel like a constant negotiation.
It’s supposed to feel like a partnership.
The truth is, no one teaches us how to do relationships well. We bring our childhood wounds, our unspoken fears, and our unmet needs into our adult relationships and then wonder why things feel so hard.
Healing begins when both people feel safe enough to be honest—not just about what’s not working, but about why they react the way they do.
That’s where the real work begins:
- Understanding your patterns, not just judging them.
- Learning to listen without defending.
- Speaking your truth without shutting the other person down.
- Rebuilding trust, even if it’s been slowly eroding for years.
- Creating connection, not just co-existence.
Couples don’t need more date nights. They need deeper understanding. They need tools to de-escalate conflict, to repair faster, and to show up with vulnerability instead of resentment.
There is a path back to each other. Even if things feel distant. Even if you’ve tried before. Even if you’re not sure it’s possible anymore.
If you’re ready to break the cycle and build the kind of relationship you both deserve, I’d love to work with you.
Through deep subconscious healing and a proven toolbox of strategies, I help couples move beyond surface-level fixes to create real, lasting change. Together, we’ll uncover the hidden patterns driving disconnection—and build stronger communication, deeper emotional safety, and a renewed sense of partnership.
Written by Kellie Hatch, Registered Mental Health Intern #26644
Kellie Hatch’s Website – https://www.naples-therapists.com/
Reauthoring Your Life: The Transformative Power of Narrative Therapy
We are all storytellers. From the moment we begin to make sense of the world, we craft narratives about who we are, what we’re capable of, and what our experiences mean. Yet sometimes, the stories we tell ourselves become limiting—creating boundaries that confine rather than possibilities that liberate.
This is where narrative therapy shines. Developed by Michael White and David Epston in the 1980s, narrative therapy recognizes that we are not our problems, and our problems are not us. Instead, our challenges exist in the narratives we’ve constructed or inherited about ourselves.
Through narrative therapy, we learn to externalize problems—to see them not as inherent character flaws but as stories that can be rewritten. When we say, “Anxiety is affecting my life” rather than “I am an anxious person,” we create space between ourselves and the problem. In that space lies freedom.
The process of reauthoring our lives begins with simple awareness. What stories do you tell yourself about your capabilities, your worth, your future? Once identified, these narratives can be examined, questioned, and ultimately transformed.
Importantly, narrative therapy doesn’t dismiss our struggles but reframes them as opportunities for growth. Every challenge becomes a plot twist rather than an ending. Every setback becomes a chapter rather than the whole book.
By identifying “unique outcomes”—those moments when the problem doesn’t dominate—we discover evidence of alternative storylines already present in our lives. These exceptions form the foundation of new, more empowering narratives.
At Sage & Lore, we believe in the power of story to heal and transform. When you turn the page and write your own story, you quite literally change your life.
What page are you turning today?
Written by Petra Wilkes, Registered Mental Health and Marriage and Family Intern #IMH25031
Yoga and Psychotherapy
In recent years, more people are turning to holistic approaches to improve their mental health. One powerful combination gaining attention is the integration of yoga and psychotherapy. While these two practices may seem unrelated at first glance, they actually complement each other in meaningful and transformative ways.
Traditional talk therapy helps people make sense of their thoughts, emotions, behaviors, and relationships. It offers a safe space to explore past experiences, process trauma, navigate anxiety or depression, and work toward greater self-understanding. But as anyone who has struggled with overwhelming emotions or persistent stress knows, our minds and bodies are deeply connected. What we think and feel doesn’t just stay in our heads, it shows up in our posture, our breath, our muscles, and our nervous system. This is where yoga comes in. Yoga, especially when practiced with awareness, is more than
just exercise. It teaches us to tune into the body, breathe with intention, and notice what’s happening in the present moment. When combined with psychotherapy, yoga can help people move through emotional blocks, ground themselves in the here and now, and develop a deeper sense of self-compassion. It can also be a powerful tool for regulating the nervous system, particularly for those recovering from trauma or living with chronic stress.
In therapy, we often talk about feelings, but many of us struggle to feel those emotions fully—especially if we’ve been taught to suppress or avoid them. Yoga provides a safe and structured way to begin reconnecting with the body, which is often where those emotions are stored. Simple breathing exercises or mindful movement can help bring awareness to areas of tension or numbness, gently inviting us to notice and release what we’ve been holding onto, often without even realizing it. For people living with anxiety, yoga’s emphasis on slow, steady breathing and present-moment awareness can be
grounding and soothing. It helps interrupt the cycle of racing thoughts and allows space for the body to relax, which in turn can support clearer thinking and emotional resilience. For those dealing with depression or grief, the gentle movement of yoga can help awaken the body and mind from a state of stagnation.
Ultimately, combining yoga and psychotherapy is about honoring the wisdom of both the mind and the body. It recognizes that healing isn’t just an intellectual process—it’s also physical, emotional, and even spiritual. Whether you’re working through trauma, managing stress, or simply trying to live more intentionally, this integrative approach can offer a powerful path toward balance and wholeness.
Written by Sophie Gengler, Master’s Level Graduate Student in Mental Health
Celebrating Mental Health Awareness Month: Why It Matters More Than Ever
May marks Mental Health Awareness Month, an essential observance that highlights the importance of mental health and encourages a conversation about mental illnesses, promoting strategies for achieving mental health and wellness. Given the challenges we’ve all faced during recent times—pandemics, social
unrest, economic uncertainties—this month’s observance feels more urgent than ever. It’s a call to pause, reflect, and engage in meaningful dialogue about mental health.
Understanding Mental Health
Mental health includes our emotional, psychological, and social well-being. It affects how we think, feel, and act. It also helps determine how we handle stress, relate to others, and make choices. Positive mental health allows people to realize their full potential, cope with the stresses of life, work productively, and make meaningful contributions to their communities.
However, when we talk about mental health, it’s crucial to address the stigma that often surrounds mental health issues. Stigma can lead to discrimination and can be one of the biggest hurdles that prevent people from seeking help. Mental Health Awareness Month serves as a reminder that mental health is as important as physical health and deserves the same quality of support and care.
This Year’s Theme
Each year, Mental Health Awareness Month includes a theme to bring focus to specific issues. For instance, recent themes have focused on tools and resources that can help people manage stress, cope with uncertainty, and recognize signs of mental health issues early on. Themes aim to make mental health care accessible and approachable for everyone, reinforcing that it’s okay to seek help.
How You Can Participate
There are many ways to observe Mental Health Awareness Month, whether you’re looking to engage on a personal level or help raise awareness in your community. Here are a few suggestions:
Educate Yourself and Others: Learn about mental health issues through credible sources and share this knowledge to help reduce stigma. Knowledge empowers people to seek help without fear of judgment.
Share Your Story: If you’re comfortable, sharing your mental health journey can inspire others to do the same and contribute significantly to dismantling stigma.
Advocate for Policy Change: Support local and national mental health advocacy groups that push for policies improving mental health services. Advocacy can lead to substantial changes in how services are provided and funded.
Promote Social Media Awareness: Use your social media platforms to spread awareness by sharing posts, articles, and videos about mental health. Use relevant hashtags to increase the reach of your messages.
Check-In on Loved Ones: Sometimes, a simple conversation asking “How are you really feeling?” can make a big difference. Check in on friends, family, and even colleagues.
Resources and Support
If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health issues, several resources are available:
National Helplines: Organizations like National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) offer helplines where you can find support and advice.
Local Mental Health Services: Search for local clinics and therapists that offer tailored mental health care.
Online Platforms: Websites and apps designed for mental health can offer tools and resources to help manage your mental well-being.
A Final Word
Mental Health Awareness Month is more than just a monthly observance. It is an ongoing commitment to creating a healthier, more compassionate society where we can talk openly about mental health issues and support each other in times of need. Let’s use this month to spread kindness, offer support, and make every effort to understand the complex world of mental health.
Written by Sherline Herard, MH24002 Licensed Mental Health Counselor
Fostering Emotional Health in Autism: MFT Strategies Enhanced with ABA Insights
Emotional well-being is foundational for learning, growth, and authentic connection. This is especially true for autistic individuals navigating a world often shaped by neurotypical expectations. Marriage and Family Therapy (MFT) offers relational tools that nurture empathy, communication, and trust. At the same time, Applied Behavior Analysis (ABA) provides data-driven methods to teach adaptive behaviors and track emotional growth.
When MFT and ABA come together, families experience both Heart and Horsepower: deep emotional healing and measurable progress.
Common Challenges & Integrated Solutions
1. Labeling Complex Emotions
Autistic children often recognize basic emotions like “happy” or “mad,” but nuanced feelings—
such as “anxious excitement” or “melancholic calm”—can be harder to identify.
Strategies:
• Feelings Wheel or Chart
Display a chart with both core and secondary emotions; revisit it daily.
• Emotion Journaling
Use drawings, stickers, or emojis to describe their feelings after key moments (e.g.,
school, outings).
• Real-Time Labeling
Gently suggest words when noticing mood shifts:
“I see you got quiet after the lights dimmed—maybe you feel a bit nervous or tired?”
Template: Daily Feelings Journal
Time | Event | How I Felt (Choose 1–2 words) | Sticker/Drawing |
8 AM | Getting ready for school | Tired, nervous | |
3 PM | Playdate ended | Sad, calm |
2. Routine Distress
Even minor changes in schedule can be overwhelming, often triggering shutdowns or
meltdowns.
Strategies:
• Visual Schedules with If–Then Cues
Pair expected vs. adjusted plans side by side:
“If snack is at 3:10, then play starts at 3:30.”
• Preview & Practice
Use a short social story or simple role-play:
“Today we’ll eat later—how might our body feel?”
• Flexible Transition Tools
Offer a sensory-friendly bridge, such as music or a fidget toy during unplanned gaps.
3. Social Anxiety & Avoidance
Interpreting social cues on the fly can feel like juggling flaming torches. Many autistic kids
retreat into comfort behaviors to cope.
Strategies:
• Social Stories & Scripts
Create a one-page guide like “How to Join a Circle Game,” with sample phrases.
• Graded Exposure
Start with short, low-pressure interactions (e.g., 5-minute chats with a new peer).
• Peer Buddies
Pair them with a peer who understands their style and offers gentle cues.
Emotional Health Within the Family System
Strained Dynamics
Emotional dysregulation affects everyone. Parents and siblings may feel torn between helping
and helplessness.
Strategies:
• Family Debrief Circles
Everyone shares one feeling and one need.
“I feel overwhelmed; I need a 5-minute break.”
• Siblings as Helpers
Assign age-appropriate roles (e.g., “You can press play on his calm-down song”).
• Safe Space Agreements
Designate a calming corner or pop-up tent for anyone needing quiet.
Template: Family Debrief Notes
Family Member | Feeling | Need |
Mom | Frustrated | Quiet break |
Sibling | Worried | More prep time |
Child | Tired | Snuggle time |
Caregiver Burnout
The constant vigilance required can lead to exhaustion, guilt, and withdrawal.
Strategies:
• Scheduled Respite
Protect 90 minutes each week for solo time, without explanation.
• Intentional Micro Breaks
Use a 5-minute ritual (tea, stretch, fresh air) with a timer.
• Peer Support
Join nonjudgmental groups to share wins and challenges.
Template: Self-Care Plan
Day | Micro Break | Respite Time | Support Group? |
Monday | Tea & window time | 6–7:30 PM | |
Thursday | Stretch break | — |
MFT Techniques for Emotional Regulation
A. Emotion Coaching in the Family Context
1. Affective Validation
“I can see you’re upset because the game changed.”
Naming the feeling reduces its power and confusion.
2. Emotional Turn-Taking
Use a timer—each person speaks for 60 seconds, no interruptions.
Builds empathy and communication.
B. Circular Communication Styles
• Linking Cause & Effect:
“What did you feel when the timer rang early?”
• Mapping Patterns:
Draw a “Trigger → Emotion → Response” chart to visualize emotional loops.
Template Mapping Patterns:
Trigger | Emotion | Response |
Alarm rings | Confusion | Running out of the room |
Loud sound | Fear | Running away |
C. Emotion-Focused Therapy Techniques
• Safe Approach Drills:
Parents calmly approach with open hands and soft voices to build trust.
• Guided Dialogues:
Use scripts like: “I’m worried when you bolt from the room. Can we think of a better
plan together?”
ABA Contributions That Enhance MFT Work
Functional Behavior Assessments (FBA)
• Track Antecedent → Behavior → Consequence to understand emotional triggers.
• Identify reinforcers—like escape or attention (see template examples)—that may
unintentionally maintain a behavior.
Template: ABC Chart
Antecedent | Behavior | Consequence |
Asked to clean up | Screaming/Yelling “no” | Mom walked away |
Using the bathroom | Yelling “Mom” | Mom comes in to help |
Teaching Emotional Skills with Behavior Protocols
• Differential Reinforcement:
Reward calm “I’m frustrated” or “I need help” statements more than emotional outbursts.
• Prompt Fading:
Gradually remove adult guidance as the child learns emotional vocabulary and self-
regulation.
Data-Driven Progress Monitoring
• Use Visual Charts to plot progress in real-time.
• Set Baseline and Goal Metrics (e.g., reduce meltdowns from 4 to 1 per week).
Template: Weekly Progress Chart
Day | Meltdowns | Calm Words Used | Coping Tool Used |
Monday | 2 | “I’m upset” x1 | Stress ball |
Final Thoughts
When MFT’s empathy-based approach joins with ABA’s precision, families gain more than
coping strategies—connection, confidence, and emotional clarity. With the right tools, emotional
health in autism isn’t just a goal—it’s a shared, achievable journey.
Printable Worksheets
1. Daily Feelings Journal- Helps children identify and express their emotions through words
and visuals.
2. Visual Schedule & First–Then Board- Assists in preparing for routine changes and
transitions.
3. Social Story Template- Guides children through social scenarios with step-by-step narratives.
4. Family Debrief Notes- Facilitates open communication about feelings and needs among
family members.
5. Self-Care Plan for Caregivers- Encourages regular self-care practices to prevent burnout.
6. ABC Behavior Chart- Tracks Antecedent, Behavior, and Consequence to understand
behavioral patterns.
7. Weekly Progress Chart- Monitors emotional regulation progress and sets achievable goals.
Written by Johana Calvo, Registered Marriage and Family Therapist Intern
Embracing the Evolving Dynamics of Change: How Change Can Benefit Your Mental Health
When we think about change, it can often evoke a sense of unease. For example, imagine a young child expressing anxiety to their mother, saying, “Oh no, we must move again. I don’t want to go to another new school.” This illustrates the fears many of us feel when faced with unfamiliar situations. Life consists of unexpected shifts, turns, and changes that touch us all. Picture yourself driving your car when it suddenly loses power, stops, and leaves you stranded on the side of the road. It can be frustrating and overwhelming, especially when you realize you need a new car, even though that wasn’t in your plans. It’s important to acknowledge these feelings and understand that change, while challenging, is a part of our journey.
Mental health counselors should be aware of clients’ changes and support them in stepping out of their comfort zones. Change can significantly challenge clients, particularly when it disrupts their everyday routines. Life transitions often affect clients’ established foundations and can reveal their capacity for resilience.
Clients experiencing divorce may face sudden and substantial changes that require adjustment. Mental health counselors frequently encounter clients grappling with the transitions and uncertainties associated with change. Focusing on embracing change rather than resisting it may facilitate personal growth, resilience, and enhanced well-being for clients.
Change can prompt individuals to move beyond their comfort zones and may facilitate personal growth. For example, someone facing a breakup might feel devastated initially but can find opportunities for self-reflection and exploration of new interests.
Job loss is another significant challenge that can create uncertainty. Individuals may experience financial strain but can engage in supportive strategies to cope. New employment opportunities may arise, as I experienced when I was laid off due to a pharmaceutical company’s decisions. Ultimately, job loss can catalyze re-evaluating career goals and pursuing new skills, which lead me to a more fulfilling career path. As counselors, we can create a platform for clients to feel free. Acknowledge your feelings: Feeling anxious, sad, or even scared when facing change is okay. Allow yourself to experience these emotions without judgment.
What are some essential tips for change?
- Implement Incremental Steps: It is advisable to decompose the change into smaller, manageable steps to mitigate feeling overwhelmed, stressed, or anxious. This approach encourages viewing change as an opportunity rather than a threat.
- Self-care is essential during change, as it can improve physical and mental health. Engaging with a mental health counselor trained in cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) may be beneficial. CBT addresses negative internal beliefs that can arise from life’s unpredictable changes. The objective of this therapeutic approach is to assist clients in replacing negative thoughts with more positive and realistic alternatives. Unhealthy negative behaviors can lead to increased anxiety, worry, and depressive symptoms.
- Emphasize Positive Aspects: It is essential to identify potential benefits and opportunities that may arise from the transition. Change can serve as a significant catalyst for positive transformation. By embracing change, individuals can foster resilience, broaden their perspectives, and ultimately lead a more fulfilling life.
Written by Maxine Martin, Mental Health Graduate Student
Whom shall I be?
I recently had a discussion with a new MHC student. They shared having been to a recent event and how moved they were by the powerful presentation of another therapist, whom they referred to as the ‘Sunshine therapist ‘. This term, they explained, symbolized a therapist who exudes warmth, positivity, and authenticity. They reflected that this was the kind of therapist they aspired to be. As expected, they expressed feeling overwhelmed of late by this unspoken expectation to be the expert and thus an invitation to NOT be fully themselves but a better-upgraded version of themselves.
I didn’t have to go back too far in my mind to recount my own experiences that mirrored theirs. But, the distance between them and now is large enough that I was able to offer them the following in response:
When we go into settings where we spend time with other professionals or people, we are often struck by either their authenticity and the powerful ways in which they show up as themselves or the lack thereof. Watching this can fuel an automatic introspection that could
invite viewers to illicit change within themselves. This change could be a great thing. If I were someone who has not engaged authentically for some time or not at all, this prompt could lead to meaningful and lasting change. However, if I am someone newer to this field, unsure of my place, or even inviting “imposter syndrome” to be a dominant story as I grow in my skills, I may accept the invitation to become someone I am not. While the invitation to change can feel ubiquitous in this generation, I posit it should not be so. If left too long without a counterbalance, this course correction of sorts can derail therapeutic growth and prowess long before it begins.
Watching someone else glow or shine in their authenticity is, point of fact, an invitation to rekindle your own fire and be more of who you are as a therapist. The fierce presence of genuine “is-ness” can be liberating and filled with an inviting adhesive quality. I want to stick with myself through this thing called life and show up in genuine ways that fuel the same desire in others to be them, too!
To all of us, regardless of our experience, the seasoned, salty, and less-so therapists among us, let’s commit to showing up as ourselves. Let’s be authentic whether we’re at work or at play. Let’s collectively make a clarion call to the unsalted among us to be authentically themselves! Because as Oscar Wilde is attributed as saying, “Be you: everyone else is already taken.” Who’s with me?
From one salty storyteller to another,
Petra, Registered Mental Health and Marriage and Family Intern #IMH25031
Sage & Lore Counseling
The Power of Somatic Healing: Integrating Mind, Body, and Emotion in Therapy
My name is Sophie Gengler and I am a graduate student in Clinical Mental Health Counseling at Northwestern University. From my experiences living in a Tibetan Buddhist monastery, studying non-dual shaiva tantra in Indonesia, practicing a silent 10 day Vipassana sitting, and teaching yoga, I have devoted myself to the exploration of the relationship between mind and body. Through my own endeavors and studies, I have witnessed firsthand how powerful the mind/body connection is. My journey has shaped my approach to mental health counseling and I intend to share the impact of somatic therapy, embodiment practices, and mindfulness training in my counseling practice.
Somatic based practices place emphasis on the body’s sensations. When we become aware of and attuned to our body’s natural impulses, we are able to connect deeper to our intuition and reactions. Modern research has shown that the body holds memories of trauma, stress, and emotional pain. These memories can exist within the fascial layers of our body, and when we move and engage in somatic practices, the body
experiences both physical release and emotional release. When we attune ourselves to these physical and emotional reactions, we can better understand our authentic layers of self. Practices such as yoga and breathwork allow space for healing and embodiment through organic, somatic movement.
Mindfulness based meditation is a form of somatic therapy that emphasizes awareness of the present moment. When engaging with the present moment through practices such as anapana meditation or vipassana visualization scans, we return to our bodily awareness which opens the doors for gentle acceptance of emotions. One of the benefits of counseling is deepened self-awareness. These kinds of embodied practices can return an individual to their body, emotions, intuition, breath, community, and ultimately to their authentic self.
The wisdoms of the body lead us directly to heightened awareness of our emotional and psychological states. We harbor an innate intelligence that can bring all aspects of yourself– mind, body, emotion, spirit–into harmony. My intention in my practice is to help people become so attuned to their body that every experience of emotion and interaction with the world is met with awareness and joy. I hope to
empower people to feel livened and enveloped by their own somatic engagement. When we become fully attuned to our emotions and fully connected to the world around us, we can experience the depths of vibrancy. Every moment becomes an opportunity to connect, authentically express, and to collaborate in the dance of healing.
Written by Sophie Gengler, Mental Health Graduate Student
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