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Embracing the Evolving Dynamics of Change: How Change Can Benefit Your Mental Health

March 21, 2025 by

When we think about change, it can often evoke a sense of unease. For example, imagine a young child expressing anxiety to their mother, saying, “Oh no, we must move again. I don’t want to go to another new school.” This illustrates the fears many of us feel when faced with unfamiliar situations. Life consists of unexpected shifts, turns, and changes that touch us all. Picture yourself driving your car when it suddenly loses power, stops, and leaves you stranded on the side of the road. It can be frustrating and overwhelming, especially when you realize you need a new car, even though that wasn’t in your plans. It’s important to acknowledge these feelings and understand that change, while challenging, is a part of our journey.

Mental health counselors should be aware of clients’ changes and support them in stepping out of their comfort zones. Change can significantly challenge clients, particularly when it disrupts their everyday routines. Life transitions often affect clients’ established foundations and can reveal their capacity for resilience.

Clients experiencing divorce may face sudden and substantial changes that require adjustment. Mental health counselors frequently encounter clients grappling with the transitions and uncertainties associated with change. Focusing on embracing change rather than resisting it may facilitate personal growth, resilience, and enhanced well-being for clients.

Change can prompt individuals to move beyond their comfort zones and may facilitate personal growth. For example, someone facing a breakup might feel devastated initially but can find opportunities for self-reflection and exploration of new interests.
Job loss is another significant challenge that can create uncertainty. Individuals may experience financial strain but can engage in supportive strategies to cope. New employment opportunities may arise, as I experienced when I was laid off due to a pharmaceutical company’s decisions. Ultimately, job loss can catalyze re-evaluating career goals and pursuing new skills, which lead me to a more fulfilling career path. As counselors, we can create a platform for clients to feel free. Acknowledge your feelings: Feeling anxious, sad, or even scared when facing change is okay. Allow yourself to experience these emotions without judgment.

What are some essential tips for change?

  • Implement Incremental Steps: It is advisable to decompose the change into smaller, manageable steps to mitigate feeling overwhelmed, stressed, or anxious. This approach encourages viewing change as an opportunity rather than a threat.
  • Self-care is essential during change, as it can improve physical and mental health. Engaging with a mental health counselor trained in cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) may be beneficial. CBT addresses negative internal beliefs that can arise from life’s unpredictable changes. The objective of this therapeutic approach is to assist clients in replacing negative thoughts with more positive and realistic alternatives. Unhealthy negative behaviors can lead to increased anxiety, worry, and depressive symptoms.
  • Emphasize Positive Aspects: It is essential to identify potential benefits and opportunities that may arise from the transition. Change can serve as a significant catalyst for positive transformation. By embracing change, individuals can foster resilience, broaden their perspectives, and ultimately lead a more fulfilling life.

Written by Maxine Martin, Mental Health Graduate Student

 

Filed Under: Anxiety, empower, Inspire, kindness, Mental Health, Women Empowerment

Whom shall I be?

March 7, 2025 by

I recently had a discussion with a new MHC student. They shared having been to a recent event and how moved they were by the powerful presentation of another therapist, whom they referred to as the ‘Sunshine therapist ‘. This term, they explained, symbolized a therapist who exudes warmth, positivity, and authenticity. They reflected that this was the kind of therapist they aspired to be. As expected, they expressed feeling overwhelmed of late by this unspoken expectation to be the expert and thus an invitation to NOT be fully themselves but a better-upgraded version of themselves.

I didn’t have to go back too far in my mind to recount my own experiences that mirrored theirs. But, the distance between them and now is large enough that I was able to offer them the following in response:

When we go into settings where we spend time with other professionals or people, we are often struck by either their authenticity and the powerful ways in which they show up as themselves or the lack thereof. Watching this can fuel an automatic introspection that could
invite viewers to illicit change within themselves. This change could be a great thing. If I were someone who has not engaged authentically for some time or not at all, this prompt could lead to meaningful and lasting change. However, if I am someone newer to this field, unsure of my place, or even inviting “imposter syndrome” to be a dominant story as I grow in my skills, I may accept the invitation to become someone I am not. While the invitation to change can feel ubiquitous in this generation, I posit it should not be so. If left too long without a counterbalance, this course correction of sorts can derail therapeutic growth and prowess long before it begins.

Watching someone else glow or shine in their authenticity is, point of fact, an invitation to rekindle your own fire and be more of who you are as a therapist. The fierce presence of genuine “is-ness” can be liberating and filled with an inviting adhesive quality. I want to stick with myself through this thing called life and show up in genuine ways that fuel the same desire in others to be them, too!

To all of us, regardless of our experience, the seasoned, salty, and less-so therapists among us, let’s commit to showing up as ourselves. Let’s be authentic whether we’re at work or at play. Let’s collectively make a clarion call to the unsalted among us to be authentically themselves! Because as Oscar Wilde is attributed as saying, “Be you: everyone else is already taken.” Who’s with me?

From one salty storyteller to another,
Petra, Registered Mental Health and Marriage and Family Intern #IMH25031
Sage & Lore Counseling

Filed Under: empower, Inspire, Mental Health

The Power of Somatic Healing: Integrating Mind, Body, and Emotion in Therapy

February 21, 2025 by

My name is Sophie Gengler and I am a graduate student in Clinical Mental Health Counseling at Northwestern University. From my experiences living in a Tibetan Buddhist monastery, studying non-dual shaiva tantra in Indonesia, practicing a silent 10 day Vipassana sitting, and teaching yoga, I have devoted myself to the exploration of the relationship between mind and body. Through my own endeavors and studies, I have witnessed firsthand how powerful the mind/body connection is. My journey has shaped my approach to mental health counseling and I intend to share the impact of somatic therapy, embodiment practices, and mindfulness training in my counseling practice.

Somatic based practices place emphasis on the body’s sensations. When we become aware of and attuned to our body’s natural impulses, we are able to connect deeper to our intuition and reactions. Modern research has shown that the body holds memories of trauma, stress, and emotional pain. These memories can exist within the fascial layers of our body, and when we move and engage in somatic practices, the body
experiences both physical release and emotional release. When we attune ourselves to these physical and emotional reactions, we can better understand our authentic layers of self. Practices such as yoga and breathwork allow space for healing and embodiment through organic, somatic movement.

Mindfulness based meditation is a form of somatic therapy that emphasizes awareness of the present moment. When engaging with the present moment through practices such as anapana meditation or vipassana visualization scans, we return to our bodily awareness which opens the doors for gentle acceptance of emotions. One of the benefits of counseling is deepened self-awareness. These kinds of embodied practices can return an individual to their body, emotions, intuition, breath, community, and ultimately to their authentic self.
The wisdoms of the body lead us directly to heightened awareness of our emotional and psychological states. We harbor an innate intelligence that can bring all aspects of yourself– mind, body, emotion, spirit–into harmony. My intention in my practice is to help people become so attuned to their body that every experience of emotion and interaction with the world is met with awareness and joy. I hope to
empower people to feel livened and enveloped by their own somatic engagement. When we become fully attuned to our emotions and fully connected to the world around us, we can experience the depths of vibrancy. Every moment becomes an opportunity to connect, authentically express, and to collaborate in the dance of healing.

Written by Sophie Gengler, Mental Health Graduate Student

Follow IG – www.instagram.com/somaticphilosophie/

Filed Under: Anxiety, Depression, empower, Inspire, Mental Health, Women Empowerment, Women's Issues

Valentine’s Day: Loving Yourself First to Love Others Fully

February 14, 2025 by

Valentine’s Day is HERE! Whether you’re spending it with a special someone, or friends, or flying solo, it’s all good! But how can we make this day a great day? Well, we’ve all heard that classic piece of advice: “You shall love your neighbor as yourself” (Rom 13:9). But here’s the kicker—“as yourself.” It’s hard to give love to others if you’re not showing yourself the same care and kindness first. Our mental health plays a huge role in this, and when we neglect it, we can lose sight of who we are and who we love.

So, as we get ready for the big day, why not check in with yourself? How can you feel truly rested and loved? Maybe it’s enjoying a delicious meal, unwinding in a relaxing bath, or getting lost in a good book at your favorite park. The key is to focus on one thing at a time and be
present in the moment.

If you’re spending the day with someone special, remember that it’s not about how much you spend but the quality of the time you share. As the Bible says, “Love cannot result in any harm to the neighbor” (Rom 13:10). It’s all about selfless giving, trust, and open communication in a relationship—these are the building blocks of the love we all seek.

So… let’s make this a day full of love for yourself and others!

Written by Juan Cubillos, Graduate Student in Clinical Mental Health

Filed Under: Anxiety, Depression, empower, faith, Inspire, Intimacy, kindness, love, Mental Health, Self-Worth

Unlocking Deep Change

December 6, 2024 by

How Working with Your Subconscious Mind Can Transform Your Therapy Journey

When it comes to achieving lasting change in therapy, working on a subconscious level is essential. Our subconscious mind is where deeply rooted beliefs, memories, and patterns reside, often influencing our thoughts, emotions, and actions without us even realizing it. While the conscious mind is responsible for logical reasoning and decision-making, the subconscious mind is like a powerful filing system, storing all our past experiences, fears, and core beliefs. Often, these stored beliefs are the very things that hold us back from reaching our goals.

Imagine setting a conscious goal to build self-confidence, but somewhere in your subconscious lies a belief, perhaps from childhood, that you’re “not good enough.” No matter how hard you work on building confidence consciously, this underlying belief may sabotage your progress, leading you back to self-doubt. By working directly with the subconscious, we can identify and reframe these limiting beliefs, allowing you to align your entire mindset with your goals.

Therapies like Rapid Transformational Therapy (RTT) make use of a relaxed, alpha brainwave state to help clients access their subconscious mind. In this state, we can revisit and process experiences that shaped current self-beliefs, seeing them through the wiser lens of adulthood. Updating these beliefs is like decluttering a storage room, creating space for new, empowering perspectives that support your goals.

Working on a subconscious level not only removes mental barriers but also speeds up the therapeutic process. It allows for deep, foundational shifts that reach far beyond surface-level thinking. When subconscious beliefs are in harmony with conscious goals, your path to growth becomes clearer, allowing you to experience greater resilience, self-trust, and authentic change. Embracing this level of inner work means you’re not just reaching your goals—you’re transforming from within, creating a foundation for lasting success and well-being.

Ready to break free from old patterns and unlock true, lasting change? Book a session today and let’s work together to align your subconscious mind with your goals for a more empowered future.

Written by Kellie Hatch, Registered Mental Health Intern #26644

 

Filed Under: Anxiety, Depression, empower, Inspire, kindness, love, Men's Issues, Mental Health, Self-Worth, Women Empowerment, Women's Issues

Navigating the Holiday Blues: Finding Light in the Season of Shadows

November 22, 2024 by

The holiday season is often portrayed as a time of joy, celebration, and togetherness. However, for many individuals, it can also be a  challenging period marked by the holiday blues. These feelings of sadness, loneliness, and anxiety during the festive season are more common than one might think. In this blog post, we’ll explore the reasons behind the holiday blues and offer practical tips for navigating
this emotionally complex time.

Understanding the Holiday Blues:
1. Social Expectations: The holiday season comes with societal expectations of happiness and togetherness. This pressure to be festive and cheerful can be overwhelming, especially for those who may be dealing with personal challenges or losses.

2. Comparisons and Reflections: The holidays often prompt reflection on the past year, which can lead to comparisons and a sense of unmet expectations. Individuals may find themselves assessing their achievements, relationships, and life choices, potentially triggering feelings of
inadequacy or regret.

3. Loneliness: Not everyone has a robust support system or close-knit family to spend the holidays with. For those who are alone or have strained relationships, the season can amplify feelings of isolation and loneliness.

4. Financial Strain: The financial burden of gift-giving, travel, and hosting can contribute to stress and anxiety. The pressure to meet material expectations can be particularly challenging for those facing economic difficulties.

Navigating the Holiday Blues:
1. Acknowledge and Accept: The first step in addressing the holiday blues is acknowledging and accepting your feelings. It’s okay not to feel festive all the time, and recognizing your emotions is an essential part of self-care.

2. Set Realistic Expectations: Manage your expectations and understand that perfection is not the goal. Embrace imperfections and focus on creating meaningful moments rather than adhering to an idealized version of the holidays.

3. Reach Out for Support: Don’t hesitate to reach out to friends, family, or support groups. Share your feelings and let others know if  you need company or assistance. Connecting with others can provide comfort and a sense of belonging.

4. Create New Traditions: If traditional holiday activities trigger negative emotions, consider creating new traditions that align with your current circumstances and bring joy. This could include volunteering, starting a new hobby, or taking a solo trip.

5. Practice Self-Care: Prioritize self-care during the holidays. Take time for activities that bring you joy and relaxation, whether it’s reading a book, going for a walk, or practicing mindfulness.

6. Seek Professional Help: If the holiday blues become overwhelming and persist, consider seeking professional help. Mental health professionals can provide support, coping strategies, and a safe space to explore and address underlying issues.

The holiday blues are a common and valid experience that many individuals navigate each year. By acknowledging these feelings, setting realistic expectations, reaching out for support, and practicing self-care, it’s possible to find light in the midst of the seasonal shadows. Remember that everyone’s journey is unique, and prioritizing your well-being is key to making it through the holiday season with
resilience and grace.

Written by Sherline Herard, MH24002, Licensed Mental Health Counselor

Filed Under: Anxiety, Communication, Depression, Family, honesty, Inspire, love, Uncategorized

3 Habits Impacting Your Mental Health

November 1, 2024 by

Oftentimes, when we think about what could harm our mental health, our minds go to major life events—the loss of a job, the end of a relationship, or the death of a loved one. But small habits that often go unnoticed can also play a major role. Below are three common habits that could be negatively affecting your mental health:

1. Not Getting Enough Sleep
Sleep impacts your mental health in numerous ways—it can affect your cognitive skills, mood, and behavior. As such, failing to get enough sleep can increase your risk of anxiety and depression and make it more difficult for you to focus, solve problems, make decisions, remember things, and control your emotions and impulses. Try sticking to the same sleep schedule, keeping your bedroom cool and dark, and performing a relaxing activity before bed (e.g., taking a warm bath or reading).

2. Being Inactive
In today’s busy world, it can be difficult to find time to exercise, but it’s important to stay active. Not only can exercise improve your physical health, but it can also boost your mental health. In fact, studies have shown that regularly exercising could reduce your risk of depression.

3. Scrolling Through Social Media
Social media can be beneficial—it can help you stay connected to long-distance family and friends and keep up with current events—but research suggests that spending too much time on it can lead to anxiety and depression. To reduce your screen time, try setting a timer, turning off notifications, or deleting apps from your phone.

Start Improving Your Mental Health
In addition to breaking the negative habits described above, one of the best things you can do to boost your mental health is speak to a therapist. Fortunately, you can entrust your care to the skilled team at our practice. Once we’ve learned more about you and any issues you may be experiencing, we’ll be able to provide you with customized advice for how to eliminate negative habits from your life and start implementing more positive ones. Contact us today to schedule your first appointment.

Written by Sherline Herard, Licensed Mental Health Counselor

Filed Under: Anxiety, Couples/Marriage, Depression, empower, Inspire, Intimacy, kindness, love, marriage, Men's Issues, Mental Health, Self-Worth, Women Empowerment, Women's Issues

My PhD Journey

October 25, 2024 by

Recently I embarked on a new journey in my PhD program. My qualitative course is one of the first three and the most challenging. This course has led to a lot of soul searching on the best way to present my research question. I decided that it may be best if I research a specific
group. I have chosen to narrow my research down to black married men. My question is currently still under construction. I want it to be a meaningful statement that articulates how the overarching theme of the study. I also do not want to lead participants to the conclusion that I am trying to make. Therefore, a vaguer description might be beneficial. My thought was “What are the communication barriers that black males face in marriage?”. I have been gauging the interest of men that I know, who are married and find communication in their relationship difficult.

So far, I have received a lot of inquiry on this topic and the idea of diving deeper into a man’s vulnerability with his wife. Specifically black men, who in my experience must consistently portray a strength. This is a very taxing façade to project at all times. An assumption of marriage is that both individuals are comfortable to show their true and authentic self. If this statement was an absolute, my assumption is that men would express more than just anger in their relationship. I tend to believe that men test the boundaries of how open they can be with their spouse. When their vulnerability is rejected through a critical reaction, disappointment, or lack of comfortability by their spouse; men tend to shut down.

As a boy growing up, I was taught that my emotions were not acceptable. This resulted in behaviors that caused more damage for my mental health. Because I did not feel safe expressing myself, I found it hard to be vulnerable with others. I also found myself in unhealthy coping mechanisms and hiding behaviors that were not seen as “good”. I longed for people that I could unpack the turmoil that I felt inside. I thought that in marriage I would find this safe space. What I found was my hiding of my true emotions gave my wife an unrealistic expectation of me as a man. I was always “strong and stoic” in our dating phase of the relationship. For 5 years before marriage my wife thought that nothing phased me. She later realized I was a ball of emotions. In the beginning of or marriage she did not know how to react to what I was saying. This led to me feeling alone and misunderstood within my own house, almost as if I was a teenager all over again. Though this sounds dramatic, it is natural for us as humans to relate our current reality to past situations. These trips back to spaces of emotional scarcity can limit our ability to be present in the moment, and while this sounds like a riveting crisis. It would be highly unproductive for
your mental health if I just left you with a problem and no way to work towards a different result.

If you find yourself in a place where you do not feel like you have the permission to be vulnerable in relationships; I believe it starts by creating a space for yourself. We have all heard the saying that you cannot give others what you do not give yourself. It is also very true that you cannot ask from others what you first ask from for yourself. If I do not think my voice matters, someone else saying it does will not validate the insecurity inside of me. As men, we must give our inner child the freedom to feel every emotion, no matter how uncomfortable. As we begin to accept, we are more than anger and excitement, we will be able to ask others accept that as well.

Written by Tim Nelson, Registered Mental Health Intern #25977

Filed Under: Anxiety, Couples/Marriage, Depression, empower, Inspire, Intimacy, kindness, love, marriage, Mental Health

Understanding Good Mental Health: A Holistic Perspective

October 11, 2024 by

As I embarked on my journey as a Student Mental Health Intern, I immersed myself in various theories, techniques, and research to enhance clients’ mental well-being. While these tools are valuable, a fundamental question persisted: “What does good mental health truly entail?”

Human experiences are diverse, yet we often find common ground in our pursuit of purpose and fulfillment—whether through a thriving career, nurturing a family, or simply leading a meaningful life. The essence of mental health becomes clearer when we acknowledge that our search for purpose invariably involves navigating mistakes and overcoming challenges. By confronting these obstacles, we learn about ourselves and our capacity to achieve our goals.

The essence of good mental health transcends external achievements; it lies in addressing and nurturing our internal struggles. Common advice to “just do what makes you happy” or “do what you think is best for yourself,” I would argue, can inadvertently foster isolation if not acknowledged with a broader perspective. Focusing solely on personal happiness might seem appealing and, in some cases, be what’s best. It may also lead to a solitary existence if it means being too comfortable and becoming stagnant.

In my view, our purpose extends beyond individual satisfaction; it involves fostering meaningful connections and communities. These relationships, forged through shared experiences and proximity, often evolve into deeper bonds that teach us about sacrifice and selflessness. By prioritizing the well-being of others, we cultivate discipline—a crucial element in forming positive habits. Though these habits may seem basic, they contribute significantly to overall mental health, such as maintaining a balanced diet or exercising regularly.

In a world with conflicting opinions and materialistic promises from media and celebrities, it’s easy to be misled about what constitutes genuine mental well-being. The notion that acquiring possessions or achieving a certain appearance will resolve our issues is a common but flawed narrative.

I would make the case that true mental health is characterized by the ability to embrace life’s joys and challenges with resilience. It involves having a supportive community to rely on in times of need and fostering a mindset that values living well not only for personal gain but also for the positive impact on others.

In essence, good mental health is a balanced state of being that integrates personal resilience, supportive relationships, and a sense of purpose that extends beyond oneself.

Written by Juan Cubillos, Graduate Student in Clinical Mental Health

Filed Under: Anxiety, Depression, empower, Inspire, kindness, Men's Issues, Mental Health, Self-Worth, Women's Issues

6 Secrets to Fast-Track Change

October 4, 2024 by

Change is inevitable; it’s one of the few constants in life. Yet, despite its inevitability, embracing change can be remarkably challenging for many of us. From personal habits to societal norms, the resistance to change often runs deep within us. But why is change so hard?

The Comfort Zone Conundrum speed

At the heart of the struggle with change lies the comfort zone – that cozy, familiar space where everything feels safe and predictable. Stepping out of this zone, even for positive changes, can evoke feelings of uncertainty, fear, and vulnerability. Our brains are wired to seek safety and minimize risk, making any deviation from the norm feel like a threat to our well-being.

The Fear of the Unknown

Change often brings with it an element of uncertainty. Whether it’s starting a new job, moving to a different city, or altering a long-standing routine, the unknown can trigger anxiety and doubt. Our minds gravitate towards what’s familiar because it feels safer than venturing into uncharted territory. Fear of failure, rejection, or simply not knowing what to expect can paralyze us and prevent us from embracing change wholeheartedly.

Habitual Patterns Die Hard

Human beings are creatures of habit. We thrive on routine and predictability because it provides a sense of stability in an otherwise chaotic world. However, this reliance on habit can make breaking free from old patterns incredibly challenging. Whether it’s quitting smoking, adopting a healthier lifestyle, or changing ingrained thought patterns, our brains resist change because it disrupts the familiar neural pathways we’ve spent years reinforcing.

Social Pressures and Expectations

Beyond individual resistance, societal norms and expectations also play a significant role in why change is hard. We are often influenced by the opinions and judgments of others, which can make deviating from the status quo feel daunting. Whether it’s conforming to cultural standards, peer pressure, or family dynamics, the fear of social rejection or criticism can hinder our willingness to embrace change.

Overcoming the Resistance: Strategies for Success

While change may be hard, it’s not impossible. Here are some strategies to help navigate the challenges of change:

1. Acknowledge and Accept: Recognize that change is a natural part of life and that discomfort is to be expected. Accepting this reality can help ease the resistance.

2. Set Clear Goals: Define what you want to achieve through the change and break it down into manageable steps. Having a clear vision can provide motivation and direction.

3. Build a Support System: Surround yourself with people who support and encourage your efforts towards change. Whether it’s friends, family, or a professional network, having a support system can provide invaluable guidance and encouragement.

4. Practice Self-Compassion: Be gentle with yourself throughout the change process. Understand that setbacks are inevitable and view them as opportunities for growth rather than reasons for self-criticism.

5. Stay Flexible: Remain open to adjusting your approach as needed. Change is rarely linear, and being adaptable can help navigate unexpected challenges along the way.

6. Celebrate Progress: Acknowledge and celebrate each milestone, no matter how small. Recognizing your achievements can boost confidence and momentum toward further change.

In conclusion, while change may be accompanied by discomfort and uncertainty, it also holds the potential for growth, discovery, and transformation. By understanding the reasons behind our resistance to change and implementing strategies to navigate it effectively, we can embrace change as an opportunity for positive growth and fulfillment in our lives. Are you ready for change?

Book a session now with Cape Coral Therapists and start your journey.

Written by Kellie Hatch, Mental Health Graduate Student

 

 

Filed Under: Inspire, Intimacy, kindness, Mental Health, Self-Worth, Women Empowerment